The Funny Thing Is…

It’s another one of those deep, thoughtful nights I’m having. On this particular night, it’s fate. I am a firm believer in fate/karma/whatever is meant to be will be, and I’m wondering how or why it works. Why do we meet certain people? Why do we friend request this person on Facebook? What makes us think, hey, maybe there’s a chance here? What gets the other person to accept the friend request and write a message back? It’s crazy these things. I could have easily left the friend request unsent, and always just daydream about it. They could have denied my request and/or accepted my request and never sent a message, but instead they did. They accepted and wrote back. Why?

I’m not a religious person, I’m more of a believe whatever you want to believe and that’s fine by me. But in moments I can’t help but think, is there a fate or a destiny laid out for each and every one of us? Are things really supposed to happen or do we just over think it all and made this all up out of nothing? Maybe there is something out there bigger than all of us. I get some people come into our lives to teach us lessons, but… there’s got to be more to it than that. Right? 

Maybe it’s not going to work out with country boy, and that’s fine by me. Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be with him, and that’s whoever’s way of telling me that. Telling me that right now, it’s not a good fit. Maybe I sent that friend request because somebody or something out there is telling me to go in that direction. I want fate to lead me in the direction of going to hockey games with a guy, nights in watching The Big Bang Theory, to innocent, sweet, playful kisses and corny jokes. But is fate going to do that? Who knows. I’m just along for the ride. While fate is working it’s magic right now, I’m waiting for something big to happen. The funny thing about fate is, you never know what exactly it’s going to do. Maybe that’s the beautiful mystery of life though. 

With all the love in my body, 

whiskeyinateacupp xo

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Be(you)tiful

Barbies should be reconstructed in my opinion. Her body is actually very unhealthy and anatomically impossible. Her frame wouldn’t be able to fit all the needed organs in her abdominal area and of course, her boobs are humongous. Isn’t it funny, though? That growing up as a little girl, Barbies were there to keep you company and for you to have a role model. Why is it that these days our role models are stick thin? Where have the curves gone? Since when is it mandatory to have a thigh gap or to have all your bones showing? How are we supposed to have the skinniest mid-section/legs/arms but have huge boobs and amazing backside? Sure, some women are blessed to have these bodies naturally and good for them, but the point is that in order to attain all that most of us would need plastic surgery, which brings me to my next thing. Why can’t people just be happy the way they are? If celebrities didn’t use plastic surgery or botox or liposuction, they’d look a hell of a lot more like us. 

Society says they want to try to make girls feel better about themselves, yet any type of advertisement the girls are fake! They have airbrush, makeup/hair artists, photoshop and etc. Since when is that realistic? Because it’s not. Just the other day I heard something that somewhere in England for a magazine company, they wouldn’t use an ad of a celebrity because it was too photoshopped. GOOD FOR THEM. Why can’t the rest of us be like that? Why are we constantly putting out the message that we have to look like airbrushed goddess 24/7? I know I personally have days where I look like a cave woman, because everybody does, but that’s okay! We can’t be perfect all the time, and at the same time… nobody is perfect. The girl in the magazine doesn’t even look like the girl on the magazine. 

And don’t feel like all this is coming from some girl’s mouth who doesn’t have a problem in the world with her looks, because I do. For a few years I suffered from an eating disorder due to being overweight and bullying from friends who I thought were my best friends. I remember one time in junior high, I was friends with this guy and we were talking a lot and I stuck by his side because I was new to the area and didn’t really know anybody else. I was walking with him one day and I said “You don’t want to be seen with me, huh? Because of the way I look.” And he said yeah. That was a real boost to my self-esteem (note the sarcasm). I’m also bullied by my mom, still to this day. She is constantly down my back about my weight. I’ll be the first to say I have curves, but she doesn’t even know about my eating disorder/act like she cares because all she wants me to do is lose weight.

Girls, you ARE beautiful and don’t let anybody ever tell you otherwise. Everybody is beautiful. If you’re going through bullying right now of any sort or an eating disorder learn from this. You will become stronger, remember what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. You can get through this, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you. It’s society that has the ugly problem. If you have some curves, so what?! Celebrate them. More to love! And just know, you aren’t the only one going through this so if you ever need or want to talk to somebody, even me, there are always people out there with the same problem who are willing to listen and maybe they could benefit from the talk too! 

With all the love in my body, 

whiskeyinateacupp

And All That Jazz

Do you ever feel like even though things in life may not be going exactly how you want them to, you finally start feeling like you’re getting a grasp on how to work life? I’m starting to feel this. I’m okay with myself, I’m okay with the circumstances I’m under. I’m learning not to wear my heart on my sleeve and give it to everybody I meet. I’m learning not to fall too hard and too fast cause let’s face it, I’m a victim of that. I wear my heart on my sleeve and I fall fast. I’m pulling back the reigns a little bit, and not giving everything away all at once. 

I like to play with flames, because I’m a curious, adventurous type of girl. That however, has resulted in me getting burned quite a few times this summer.

THE ARMY BOY 

Okay, okay, okay. I know what you’re thinking. “Why would you ever start something with somebody who is going off?” Well, that’s because I had feelings for him. He was the first boy I actually had feelings for besides my ex. Him and I were friends and he lives across the street from me, well before he went off into the army. I’ve known him for a couple years now, but up until say… March or April, we didn’t flirt because I was with my ex (my ex and I were an on again/off again kind of thing, annoying I know) so when we were broken up for a couple months, I was talking and flirting with army boy. He told me he didn’t want to start a relationship before deploying, which I understand. He said he liked me though, and I liked him too. Things weren’t really going anywhere, though, so I told him my ex and I started talking again. I gave him a fair warning. He didn’t object, didn’t complain or anything, so I thought whatever. He must not be that into me. Fast forward, he comes home for a two week visit. My ex and I had broken up, so we met up at night. Things were going great, he said he still liked me and I still liked him. We fooled around a bit, because I thought hey… maybe there’s a chance things might work out. We went to a party together, and he was texting a girl. I joked, “Texting with your girlfriend?” And he said “Possibly in the future.” Ouch. That one hurt. When I got home, I started thinking because I over think and over analyze things and it never ends well. I told him we needed to talk and I wondered what was going on between us. He ignored the conversation and wouldn’t text back. Eventually, a few days later, I got him to talk about it. Basically, he didn’t like me anymore, because of what happened with my ex. Maybe I walked into that one myself, but if he had objected and somewhat fought for me, then I probably wouldn’t have done anything with my ex but it seemed army boy didn’t really care. So then, he told me he didn’t want to get into a relationship because he is being deployed soon. I completely understand that, I do. Then he told me he just wanted to be “friends with benefits”. Ouch. There comes the hurt again. Me being me, I gave it a chance and we met up again that night and fooled around again. Fast forward to a couple weeks after he went back to base across the country, he met a girl. Him and her are now in a RELATIONSHIP. What the hell?! She isn’t even cute. Whatever. So, I was burned majorly by that flame and in result, I put a lid on that candle real fast. 

THE COUNTRY BOY

So, I met him maybe a month after army boy. We weren’t talking for very long, but when we did we TALKED. I’m talking, all day long every day through multiple means of communication. He seemed like a real, down to earth guy. I hadn’t developed feelings yet, because we had only been talking a few days but I know that him and I could be good together. I just feel like there’s something there. And he likes COUNTRY. It is so unbelievably hard to find a boy in southern California who likes country, because that’s what I was raised on. I listen to a whole range of things from country to rap, but I’ve never met a boy my whole entire life who likes country music. We had talks about going out on a date, joking around about me bringing him lunch on his lunch break at work and he even stopped by one night to see me. For once, after a couple guys of me servicing them (if you get my drift. Army boy was one of them) and nothing for me, he serviced MY engine. He didn’t even ask for me to do anything to him. Was he sent from god? Possibly. His kissing abilities? Amazing. His hands, though? PERFECT. Gosh, thinking about it now…  anywaaaaays, a week later he joined school on top of his work. He told me he had no time to be in a relationship. I understand that, and what happened between us was not his fault/on purpose, that I know of anyways. Guys seem to be real sketchy sometimes, though. And he used the line “we can still be friends though.” I thought, oh okay sure. You say “lets still be friends” which means let’s never talk again, fine. But the next day, he actually texted me. For once, a guy actually meant “let’s still be friends”. Could he get any better? We continued talking for a week, and then communication just fell out and he stopped responding back to me. Here I am thinking, here it goes again… I give everything of me to him, I put my heart on my sleeve and I try to make things work. I need to learn not to play with fire. I need to learn to be the fire instead. So, after a few weeks of not talking… guess who starts talking to me again? Country boy. So this time, I’m going to make him work for it and see what happens. Hopefully it ends differently than last time. Because I’m tired of getting burned 

So, I’ve learned to be the fire. I’m taking control of the situation and I’m going to be the one calling the shots. For once, I want to learn to be the heart breaker and all that jazz. I’m not going to be the one sitting on the sidelines waiting for him. Maybe this time he’ll realize to keep in touch with me, because I’m not an every day person. I’m a one in a million kind of girl. 

With all the love in my body, 

whiskeyinateacupp xo 

Star light, star bright, where can I find Mr. Right?

Where oh where have all the good boys can these days? It’s to the point where I’m no longer looking for Mr. Right, I’m just looking for Mr. Good To Me. Is he hiding out? Did he walk into a store as I walked out? It seems like my timing is off, or something is just not working out. Maybe Mr. Right is not who I think he is. How do you even know if Mr. Right is Mr. Right? 

First off, I’d like to state something. Guys are jerks. Well, most of them are anyways. I feel bad for the very few guys who aren’t jerks and who get this stereotype just because so many guys are jerks. They really only do want one thing… well from my experience, anyways. I have yet to meet a guy these past few months who isn’t after sex. Can us girls just get a break? Is it so hard to ask for a guy who wants to have a conversation and THEN we can start talking about getting a home run. Maybe if they treated us decently then we’d start thinking about that. Instead of starting the conversation right off the bat with “you’re so pretty” or “hey sexy”. A good guy that does not make. And ladies, please do not fall for this. He is just trying to butter you up and then go for your muffin. He would like to butter your muffin. (Mean girls reference). 

Secondly, where can a girl find a decent guy nowadays? A guy with ambition and drive, a guy who is smart, isnt a d-bag, is kind, loyal, doesn’t flirt with every breathing girl he sees. I’d be lying if I said I wanted somebody who was cute, too. Now, don’t get me wrong. I don’t have to have the hottest guy in the world, and I don’t believe that looks are everything… but you really can’t be with somebody who you aren’t even physically attracted to. With all this being said, I have a list of things I look for in a guy in no particular order and somebody please let me know if I am being too picky here, because I feel that I am not. 

  • He has to be a decent couple inches taller than I am. I’m 5’6, so not too tall, but height is a big thing I look for in a guy and always has been. 
  • He has to have some type of ambition/drive/passion about SOMEthing. That is just so sexy to me, whatever it is, he just has to love it. 
  • He is stable and I don’t have to be guessing every second wondering about what he’s doing or what he’s going to do. 
  • Tattoos are a definite plus, but he doesn’t have to have them. 
  • He is a good guy, but not perfect in any way. I’d love a good guy who isn’t a goody-two-shoes. I don’t want somebody who has no backbone and won’t fight with me. I want to fight. I want to know he has an opinion with something and quite frankly, I would love a guy who could stand up to me because I can be a bit fiesty. 
  • A guy who is up for an adventure and doesn’t want to be a homebody, because I love to be up and doing things. Life is too short to waste on a couch watching TV all day. 
  • And let’s face it, a guy who can cook is just going to make me drool.
  • Most importantly, I want him to be kind to people and be optimistic in life. I don’t need to be dating a negative nancy. I’m optimistic myself, so I would love somebody to see the beauty in life that I do and appreciate it with him. 

If there are any takers, please feel free to sign up. Just kidding… kind of. 

Is it just that some girls’ expectations or standards too high and specific these days? I feel that some girls have this huge laundry list of things they’re looking for in a guy and it’s ridiculous. Sure, there are specific things everybody would love to have in their significant other, but they aren’t necessary. Sometimes it’s really good to be interested in different things. It can be good in the way that we can learn new things. Also that, a couple doesn’t have to be together 24/7 365. I don’t want to be tied down all day every single day. I like to be independent and do things on my own sometimes. I don’t need a guy following me to the nail salon to get my nails down. I despise girls who drag their boyfriends everywhere with them. YOU DON’T NEED HIM WITH YOU TO DO ALL YOUR GIRL THINGS. Please girls. STOP. And if you make him do it with you, you better be willing to do that with him. A relationship is all about give and take. 

Finally, my closing statements. A guy doesn’t need to be perfect because nobody is perfect. He doesn’t have to have everything. He just has to have respect and that seems to be lacking in most guys these days. Where have all the gentlemen gone? It would be lovely for the girls who don’t do wrong to guys (like me) to have those males step forward again. 

With all the love in my body, 

whiskeyinateacupp xo 

My 7 Obsessions <3

Seems like just yesterday I was writing this, even though it was a week ago. Time flies fast when you’re busy. 

  • Hope. Because these days all I’m living off of is hope. 
  • Healthy foods. Because let’s face it, I need to lose some weight and we should all live healthy 
  • Candles. Because there’s something about the soft scents and the gentle flicker of light. 
  • The 1975. Because I have discovered this band this week and they are AMAZING 
  • Oversized sweaters. Because they are so cute and so warm. 
  • Gray nail polish. Because it just looks so fresh, especially paired with a dark metallic blue! 
  • Hobby Lobby. Because if you know about this store… you know. This store is like a home decorators crack. I love to decorate, I wish I had money to redecorate my room! 

With all the love in my body, 

whiskeyinateacupp xo

Autumn Livin’

There’s just something so exciting about the fall! The freshness in the air, the scents, the chill, the soft sun in the afternoon, the colors… everything. There’s something to be said about the quote “life starts over again in the fall”. I believe in this. This summer for me has been full of ups and downs, full of excitement and anger. It gave me many firsts, some that I will never forget. It was a long, hot, crazy summer… in more than one way. It was the summer I will never forget, my most favorite one even though some parts of it were terrible. I grew up in this summer, I learned, I took risks, I laughed until I cried, I cried until I laughed. Everybody has that one summer that will always be in the back of their minds. The one where they took adventures, where they got their hearts broken, where they broke hearts. As autumn comes though, these things fade out. The tans fade, the hair gets darker, summer romances slowly burn out. Things start all over again and everybody gets a fresh start. The cool air sweeps away the heat of the summer. It sweeps away everything that happened, as it all just becomes a memory. I will forever cherish this summer, but as autumn comes I find myself growing up even more. This summer taught me a lot, I’ll admit. However, autumn is my favorite season. Things are just perfect. Whatever happened during summer is just a delicious memory now. 

Autumn brings out something in people, I believe. It brings out hard workers, soul searchers, lovers and a peace. There is something to be said about those gorgeous, peaceful autumn nights where everything is just so. Autumn is magical. Everybody changes, we all grow up. We all have another summer full of memories under our belt. We grow older, more mature, some wiser. Others fall in love in the fall and everything goes out the window. The love that begins in the fall… it is so beautiful. Everything is just better in the fall. 

With all the love in my body, 

whiskeyinateacupp xo

A Broken Heart is Blind

Love makes us do all sorts of things. It makes us crazy, silly, sometimes better people, sometimes worse people. It makes us insane, giggly and sometimes terrified. We do all sorts of things when in love. Love is a funny thing. It messes with you physically, emotionally and mentally. It changes the way you think about things, for good and for bad. As I sit in a Starbucks at a mall tonight, I watch all the couples walk in and out. I watch the ones outside in the chilly air walking by the trees lit up with lights. They all seem so happy. I wonder all the dynamics of their relationship, because everybody meshes differently with different people. Have they ever felt a broken heart before? Are they just putting up a front with their happiness? Maybe they’re going through heartbreak right now, have been recently or will be in any second. Life changes with every breath we take. I sit here and wonder this because we all know a broken heart is blind, and unlike love, it can make you do ANYTHING. A broken heart will transform you into a person you never thought you could be. It makes you realize how bold you are. It definitely does to me. In a matter of a couple hours, I will be watching the look on my ex’s face as I drop off all of our memories with him. He’ll have the necklaces he gave me. The one with the key on it from his diary when he was a little boy, the one that held so much meaning. He’ll have the one with the diamond heart on it from our first Christmas. He’ll have the movie ticket of our first date/first time seeing each other. He’ll have a ticket from a party we went to together. He’ll have the promise ring he bought me for our one year anniversary. He’ll have all of our movie tickets. He’ll have all of his clothes back. He’ll have a pink teddy bear he gave/won for me back. I will be leaving it on his car for him for when he gets off of work because I want no contact with him. Maybe it’s a cowardly thing to do, give it to him like that instead of face to face. I will be sitting in my car far from his, watching the reaction on his face. He probably doesn’t think I’d ever do this. He wouldn’t expect me to have the balls to drive all the way out to his work to do this. I want to see the shock on his face. He probably is not expecting this. I’m currently on the fence of hating my ex. They do say love/hate is a fine line.

I can be a ballsy person when I’m feeling bold. I think we should all be sometimes. All it takes is 20 seconds of courage, 20 seconds can change your life. However, when you have a broken heart… you live on adrenaline. It courses through your veins. A broken heart is blind. Love is funny, I always wonder about it. One thing is for sure, I’m in love with love. It’s such a beautiful thing. 

With all the love in my body, 

whiskeyinateacupp xo