We Need to Talk

We’ve all heard those words. 

The words that make our brains go haywire, our hearts drop to our butts and our stomach flutter up. 

Usually, it’s never in a good way though. 

This time, I was the one to say them. 

Thursday during the day, for those of you who know of the app, I snapchatted School Boy a picture of a pink VW bug because I thought it was funny. He replied back a few hours later with just a picture of his face with no caption. At that point, I was getting frustrated with him because we were barely talking and I still had hopes for him even though Mr. Nice Guy and I were progressing. So, I didn’t even bother to reply because I was mad at him. 

You can put captions with your picture, so it’s more of a reply back. You can also see when the other person has opened the snaps. 

Another few hours later, after no reply back to him, he snapchatted me again. Twice. 

One said that he misses me. The second said that he was sorry for being so cold shouldered to me. 

I said I missed him back and that it was okay. 

He said he’s been hurt a lot before so he’s really scared to get into a relationship or anything. At this point, I decided to text him because snapchats have a short word limit on captions. 

In a nutshell, I told him I wasn’t sure exactly how he’s been hurt before except for the ex that kept them a secret from everybody and then also cheated on him, but I wouldn’t hurt him. I’m not afraid to show the world if he was my boyfriend. I told him that in an argument I’m not going to just bail out on him. Also that sometimes in love and life you have to take risks because you can’t live sheltered otherwise you’ll never find something great. I also brought up that I’ve been hurt so many times by guys so much that I want to punch every single one of them in the face but I’m still trying. 

And then I dropped it on him. I told him that even though I like him, I can’t wait around forever. I told him that I came second choice to my ex for so long, I can’t be that anymore. I said I’m not an option to anybody and that I deserve so much better. 

He came back with an apology. He said he knows he’s being tough with me and he does like me, but he’s scared and he wants to make time to hang so we can try and figure this all out. 

That was pretty much the end of that conversation, after I agreed and said thank you. 

Sunday night, Mr. Nice Guy got really upset and down when I said him and I might not work out due to long distance and I told him I’d have to see our physical connection first. 

I realized talking to these two guys needs to come to an end really quick. 

I texted School Boy Sunday and told him we needed to hang out soon. He agreed. I then asked when and assured him that I’m not rushing or forcing him into a relationship, that I’ve just been waiting a couple months since he’s gotten back home and nothing has happened. I told him we either need to see some progress or I’m not waiting around anymore. 

He told me he understands it’s not fair to keep me waiting, so he promised sometime this week by Friday we’ll hang out. 

It’s now Wednesday night and he hasn’t brought it up, but we have been talking today. 

I’m torn between feelings about him. 

On one hand, it seems really flaky and like he’s not interested at all. 

But if that’s true… why has he bothered to hold on this long? He does seem to want to work things out and see what we can do or where we can go from here. He flirts back with me.

School Boy does have more in common with me than Mr. Nice guy, though. He would also fit in better with my family. School Boy also happens to be pretty much down the street from me and Mr. Nice Guy is going to be living in San Francisco, five to six hours north and driving down here on his spare time.  

The problem is, I know how Mr. Nice Guy would be in a relationship and he’s very loving and caring. I don’t know how School Boy is going to be, so I want to give him a chance and find out.

If we can ever hang out, that is. 

I just don’t know. 

What I do know is, I need to figure this out really quick otherwise it’s going to get messy dealing with the two boys and one of the three of us is going to end up extremely hurt. 

With all the love in my body, 

whiskeyinateacupp xo

 

Advertisements

11 thoughts on “We Need to Talk”

  1. I don’t see why School Boy is being so hesitant. I mean, we all grieve differently, but if he needs more time he had no business leading people on. When I first met my boyfriend (who I’ve been dating for 5 years), he had just been dumped by his long time high school sweetheart who he had planned on asking to marry him. He hadn’t even been out of that relationship for four months, but when we had ‘the talk’ he agreed to be exclusive. We were boyfriend and girlfriend. Now, it was another year and a half before the L word was said… but I was okay with that for my own reasons.

    I guess what I’m saying is, it’s stupid for him to not want to be in a relationship if he’s leading you on. You just need to be sure you discuss what you both need. Just because we didn’t say the L word for so long does not mean we didn’t discuss where our relationship was headed.

    1. You made really good points and I took that all to heart when I read your comment through my email, because I do take your guys’ opinions to heart and really think them over! He obviously wasn’t ready for any kind of commitment, either with me or maybe another girl, I’m not sure. However I did tell him that it was time for me to move on the other night, so him and I are done because it wasn’t fair for me to keep on waiting for him!

  2. you have your hands tied, but are seeking to get a hold of all the randomness so that’s good 🙂

    *tries to say more, but passes out due to his being sick*

    lol

  3. I honestly don’t buy it I think school boy might be juggling a few girls. It doesn’t sound like you are giving mixed signals to me I think you’ve been strait with him about being interested if he’s not reciprocating he just isn’t that interested. If he is interested and he’s acting like this well clearly he’s not ready for a relationship. Even if you are okay with something casual and don’t care about monogamy I think you will be agonizing over his neuroses the whole time. Why doesn’t he call me? He was so sweet yesterday and now he’s an ass what’s up? You don’t need that. You deserve better.

    1. I get these comments through my email, which is why I don’t reply back because I don’t think I can through email, but I read yours when I got it and thought… holy crap. They’re right. You provoked that thought into my head and I realized, I needed to call it off with him and tell him I’m done, which I did. So thank you for sharing that thought!

  4. School Boy’s inability to make plans with you is kind of frustrating– that’s a relationship pet peeve for me. I dated a guy like that and he could NEVER make any sort of concrete plan in advance. It made me feel like he expected me to just constantly be available to him and when I made other plans he would get all offended and shitty. Your guy might not be that manipulative but it’s still pretty inconsiderate to not make you and your time a priority. Grrr.

    1. It’s definitely a pet peeve of mine too! With anybody really! It’s like do we always have to be the ones to make plans??? And then them flake every time? Ugh, no thank you! haha
      Don’t worry though, I told him I was done waiting even though I didn’t really want to, I knew I owed it to myself and my nice guy!

  5. It sounds like he is doing a lot of two-ing and fro-ing, when what he really needs to do just man up and makeup his mind. I think if it was going to happen, it would’ve happened. I’m not saying write him off, but I wouldn’t waste too much time on waiting around for him.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s