Sometimes I think as humans, we tend to hold on to things longer than we should.
I am a victim of that and I’ll admit it. I always have this hope for something and give it plenty of shots and chances. More than somebody with a sane brain should.
Unfortunately for me, I am neither sane nor do I use my brain.
Like I stated in a previous post, I follow my heart no matter what even if it leads me to troubling times.
I told School Boy I was done Sunday night. First, he promised to meet up by Tuesday. We didn’t.
Then he said we’d meet up by Friday. We didn’t.
Finally, he promised we’d meet up by Sunday. Guess what? Still nothing. Although he had time to hang out with his friends. I was growing tired of this flaking out crap.
Thanks to all of your guys’ opinions I realized something.
He obviously wasn’t ready for commitment of any kind and I was. I am.
So I told him all that. He didn’t put up any sort of a fight.
As much as I had hoped we would get together and all the good things I know would’ve come or could’ve been. I knew I couldn’t wait around any longer. It sucked and I was really sad doing it, but I know there’s a great guy waiting for me who deserves somebody focused on him.
I know I deserve better. A fellow blogger pointed out School Boy is like a reincarnation of my ex.
That hit right at home. As soon as they spoke about that and I read it, that realization hit me.
I don’t deserve that again and I will be nobody’s option or second choice. That’s what I was… to both of them.
So, goodbye School Boy.
Hello, Mr. Nice Guy.
I’m still taking things slow between my nice guy and I. I want to make sure this is absolutely, hands down, 100% something I want to do. I want to make sure I’m for sure on dating somebody and can deal with being long distance for six months, with seeing him however much in between that.
I know he’s loyal, faithful, honest and all that. He’s the only guy I have no doubts with. I would trust him with all of me in any type of situation with a girl that I normally would be worried about with a guy.
He already is wanting to spoil me with gifts and things, even though I tell him that’s not necessary and it makes me feel bad when people spend a bunch of money on me.
I told him that I am going to take a drive up to San Francisco closer to summertime to visit him if we work out, and he offered to pay for the hotel.
He cleans. He lived with his grandma for a bit and sometimes before she woke up he would have the house cleaned for her.
He seems like the type of guy who comes from a perfect home where he had an amazing father figure. Where his parents loved each other dearly. As I’ve discovered though, that’s farther from the truth.
His dad was actually in jail, and eventually died from alcoholism I believe if I remember that bit correctly. Mr. Nice Guy only got to visit him every three years. He grew up with his mom and other sisters. He was the only boy in the house, growing up with absolutely no father figure in his life. One ex husband of his mom’s actually beat her. He got to witness this and one time stood up for his mom. The step dad was going to hit him, but his mom then returned the favor of standing up for her son.
His mom has this rule of kicking her children out when they turn 18. I disagree with this, but hey she’s doing something right to have her son turn out this amazing.
He’s in the Air Force, a reservist studying medicine. When he’s going to San Fran, he’s putting his work of studying to be a LabTech to work.
Soon, sometime this week… I will be able to see him. He’s going to come to my front door, dressed in his uniform to see me in the morning before I have to get ready for class.
Panty dropper, right?
While he’s here I plan on making his first kiss so memorable.
Maybe it’s the fiesty side of me kicking in… but I want to rock this boy’s world in more ways than one.
With all the love in my body,